Artist's Way: Week 1 - Recovering a Sense of Safety

[AmyK]

Let's start! I read through week 1 and did several of the exercises this morning. A little therapy is a great thing!! I think each week I will just post her weekly check-in questions. If I'm late, or you're ready, just post these questions on Mondays so everyone can check in. Feel free to share as little or as much as you want to. Since this is the first week, you most likely will not have done Morning Pages and an Artist Date yet, but if you have feel free to share. :) Post links to AW related layouts in these threads too. ;)

**Anyone is free to join us at any time! If you have already gone through these weeks, and you are on another week, feel free to check in where ever you are.**

1. How many days this week did you do your morning pages? Seven out of seven, we always hope. How was the experience for you?

2. Did you do your artist date this week? Yes, of course, we always hope. And yet artist dates can be remarkably difficult to allow yourself. What did you do? How did it feel?

3. Were there any other issues this week that you consider significant for your recovery? Describe them.

[AmyK]

I'll start with something I did this morning. One of the week 1 exercises is to write a letter to the editor about one of your creative monsters. One of my monsters came up last year when I first attempted to get through these exercises (knocking me creatively unconscious for nearly a year). During the naming ceremony here at DAQ, my mother-in-law poked in and gave me a good creative thrashing, telling me that I can no longer be free to be creative, because my husband is studying to be a pastor and there are certain expectations for my behavior. (Obviously, artistry is not allowed of a pastor's wife, which is why she is a terribly blocked creative!)

First of all, I realize that I made a mistake in thinking others would be open to my new discoveries. This time, I am sharing none of it on my blog for my family to read. I feel that DAQ is safe for me again, I have not shared links to this site or my gallery here in nearly a year, not because I don't love the site, but because I need my personal privacy. So... without further ado... my letter to the editor, meant with all due respect and a deep love for my mother-in-law and a wish that she may become unblocked and creative herself...

To whom it may concern:
Beware the heat of the ice monster! She has flaming red hair and ice cold blue eyes, and anyone who comes into contact with her would be wise to flee in terror! She is hard as stone, and her will bends to no one. Do not be fooled by her weepy eyes, as her sensitivities lead no further than her own thoughts. She wishes to bring everyone under her power. But no longer will I succumb to her attempts to bully me into silence and darkness! When you see her face burn red in anger, clashing with the orange hue of her hair, beware! She is furious that I am defying her with beauty and creativity. And defy her I will.

Sincerely,
Amy

[mizamigo]

Oh Wow, Amy, good luck with mil. It's good that you have DAQ to be creative.

I started week 1 and the morning pages - missed a couple of days; but re-started and hope to continue. It's even fun just to write with no objective in mind. Just freeflowing words. That in itself is creative; but I think it's going to be a big surprise when I am allowed to go back and read some of the things I've written.

No play dates yet - but I did get that book and I'll be looking though it to see what I want to do for FUN.

And no letter to the editor. I guess I don't need to do that yet; my in-laws are too far away and they aren't really downers on creativity. No kids around the house either. So if it's going to be anyone it's going to be me against myself... Hum that might happen as a self-sabotage thing. I'll have to be aware of when that happens.

Thanks for doing the moderating for this.

[kygirl]

So far, I've signed the contract, read the chapter, and completed morning pages every day for almost a week.

The only exercise I've completed is the one asking what five other careers I would like to have had: librarian (or bookstore owner), artist, chef, forest ranger and psychologist. I'm planning on baking some bread this week to embrace my chef leanings.

I'm really enjoying the morning pages, and because I'm writing without spending a lot of thinking about it, I find myself writing about things I don't even know are bothering me. A couple of times, I've found myself saying, "I'm not ready to address that yet." That's when I know I'm making progress.

Thank you, Amy, for encouraging us to do this. For me, it couldn't have come at a better time. I'm so glad you're back; we really missed you.

[Vania16]

I'm mostly going to be an "Arist's Way Stalker" this time around, but I wanted to chime in and say how proud of you I am Amy! And, how happy I am that you've reclaimed DAQ as a creative space for you :) As the daughter of a pastor I can tell you that trying to repress yourself to make others happier or to live up to what they expect can only make you miserable - at least that was my experience.

I will also say that I still do the artist dates with myself and I love it! I start to get really out of sorts if I don't do it. This week I went to the yarn store :)

[AmyK]

And now, finally, my contract (http://www.digitalartquirks.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=3062&cat=500&ppuser=32). It looks how I feel today - mismatched and less than pretty. :rolleyes:

[mizamigo]

Thanks Amy, for doing your contract. Here's my contract:
http://www.digitalartquirks.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=3072&nocache=1

[graybonnie]

Amy... so happy you found a way to have a safe haven. The safety of creating is a core component in my mind. I wish you great joy in this new adventure.

[AmyK]

Thanks all! I am just so thankful for this place, and for the encouragement of all of you! I am really looking forward to the next several weeks - I think even moreso because I am keeping it a "secret" when I normally wouldn't.

My hubby is all encouraging too - he was even suggesting places I could go for my Artist's Dates!! :D

[ScrapAlice]

The contract. (http://www.digitalartquirks.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=3074&cat=500&ppuser=325)

I began my "morning pages" around noon, because that is when I normally get up, being the supreme night owl I am.

[Diginellie]

Oh Alice I am a lark - I do my morning pages at around 5.30am most days but I go to bed around 9.00pm

[kygirl]

Well, I have honey oatmeal bread baking (one of my five career choices was to be a chef) and I've finished my journal pages this morning. I wanted to do my Artist's Date today, but I'm having a little bit of vertigo and I'm afraid to drive. So far, I've steered clear of doing the assignment naming those who've discouraged us in the past. I guess I'm just not ready to go there yet.

How are the rest of you doing on the assignments? I love seeing the contracts in the gallery.

[yhalos47]

Oh this is fantastic..I hope I'm not too late..
I saw this challenge at anothere site and it was way into the book. I think I may be able to catch up to you guys. I've been a lurker for a long time.
I love altered art and I think I'm going to give this a shot...

[kygirl]

I'm so glad you've come out of lurking. Welcome to DAQ. :) This is the perfect time to join us. We just started Monday, so it won't take you long to catch up.

Please let us know if you have any questions.

[AmyK]

Yay, welcome out of lurkdom! I'm glad you're joining us! We're really only a few days in, so I'm sure you can catch up. :) Just start those morning pages.

I've done my pages this week, but have yet to officially plan my Artist's Date. I know what I'm doing, I'm just not sure when yet. I'm fighting off the Imaginary Lives exercise, so I know I'm going to have to do that one. Donna, if you name your monsters, I'll allow myself a chance to dream - how's that sound? ;)

[kygirl]

Okay, Amy, I've confronted my demons: the 5th grade teacher who made me sit in the hall alone when I finished my work before the rest of the class; the "friend" of my mother's who complained about all of those smart-alec Beta Club kids (grinning this little smarmy malicious grin all the while); and my own mother who made it clear that people don't like folks who are different.

Oddly enough, my mother is also on the list of my strongest supporters. She has several pieces of my Quirk art framed and hanging on her walls.

This is certainly an interesting journey, not always fun, but always interesting.

[coffeequeen]

Oh I'm so glad you all are doing this! I don't know if I will do more than watch this time around as one of my demons seems to be clutter, and Fly Lady and I are trying valiantly to get a grip on that. But I sure can think of a few I'd like to write to!

And Lisa, I can empathize...both my parents are ministers. What is it about creativity that frightens them so? They see it as a freedom that leads us to destruction I think. I see it as an amazing gift from a loving God, and Who is more creative than He???? Wow...I really do find it mind boggling that artistry is seen as threatening, but I'm convinced that notion (or hoping) belongs to generations prior to mine.

[AmyK]

Donna, I'm so proud of you! You are right, it's not always fun, but definitely interesting.

Keeping up my part of the bargain, here are my 5 other lives:

-Author/Screenwriter
-Shaolin Monk (I'm obsessed with Kung Fu, although admittedly not a buddhist, but if I get to dream about another life, then here it is)
-Wildlife/Forest Service worker
-Baker
-Bass player in a rock band

[AmyK]

I just had to add that I went back through and read your list, Donna, after I did mine and notice we have a few similarities! Bread baking is on my list of things to do at some point as well. :)

[jennv]

OK, so I would love to jump in here too. I just met the UPS man on my front step to get my books. Yeah!! I'm hoping to get some reading in right now....but usually can't get much of anything in until the boys are in bed. So.....I'm just so excited as this process couldn't have happened at a better time for me. So off to reading and I will post my contract, etc. later.

Look forward to getting to creating here....

[digime]

Well it's day three and already I missed yesterday's morning pages! I woke up (late) to a phone call and hit the floor running and never did get back to them. Oh well, I'm back at it today and I do enjoy it.

I did my list of alternate lives:
graphic designer
music video maker
buddhist nun/monk
book store owner
bed and breakfast/small inn, owner
tug boat operator (I've always wanted to do this!)
urban planner/designer

I haven't done any of the other exercises yet but plan to go on my artist's date today and visit a small gallery in my village, which I'm off to do right now!

[kygirl]

Kate, I love your list. I wanted to be a nun, too, and I wasn't even Catholic. But the singing nun was on TV all the time, and she looked so sweet and pretty. LOL

[Diginellie]

Well, here are my `other lives'

Mother
Milliner
Landscape Designer
Writer/Poet
Archeologist
Interior Designer
Psychotherapist

Hmmm..... a somewhat varied collection. I am having a go at No. 3. Our acreage is somewhat chaotic at present and I have plans :) But I also love hats and really want to decorate a few so I will also have a go at No. 2 :)

[adee]

this looks really interesting. hope you don't mind if I try to catch up? just off to think about some alternative careers...mmm.

[kygirl]

Adee, I'm glad you're joining us.

Helen, I saw the most beautiful hats today while shopping. This weekend is the Kentucky Derby, and just about every woman in attendance will be wearing a hat. The bigger the hat, and the more sophisticated the design, the better. The one I fell in love with today was lime green, with gorgeous hot pink and purple flowers. I know that sounds tacky, but it really was lovely.

For my first Artist's Date, I went to an art gallery/boutique and then onto the bookstore to search for books and magazines on design. I had a good time, and it really was fun to be out on my own.

[adee]

For my first Artist's Date, I went to an art gallery/boutique and then onto the bookstore to search for books and magazines on design. I had a good time, and it really was fun to be out on my own.

that sounds like a fun outing. i've ordered the books so just waiting for them to arrive now.

[kygirl]

Forgive me, sisters, for I have...forgotten to do my morning pages, and it's almost 9:30 p.m. Between NSD, Derby Day, and my visiting daughter and grandson, it's been a little hectic. I guess I'll get back on schedule tomorrow.

[Nevermore]

I am so proud of you all for doing this! It has been too long for me to remember much of this. Reading Donna's list of people who were not supportive was interesting and set off some echoes in my head for sure although to be totally fair I would have to say that my biggest detractor then and now is me. Once upon a time I had an amazing opportunity to enter a newly formed university department in creative writing and I turned it down for many many reasons (most lame). The main reason was I didn't think I had anything to say. Now that I have been scrapping for a few years and have collected a ton of layouts, the thing that strikes me most about them is what I am saying. Turns out I have a kazillion things to say. I am not judging whether they are relevant or important or artistic. Simply that I have them and scrapping has given some of them voice. [Raven now ending this unauthorised interruption, lol! I just hate when I am not a part of everything going on around here!]

[digime]

Helen, I was so intriugued at Millner being on your list. Hat's seem to have become passe in our relaxed culture although I know in England it is still de rigueur to wear a hat to a wedding...and of course to the Royal Ascot! I saw a picture in the paper today of Queen Elizabeth at the Kentucky Derby in her hat. I was in a Millner's shop in London a few years ago and although I don't feel I wear hats well, they were all stunning creations!
I also had landscape designer on my original list but took i off when i saw how long my list was getting!

[adee]

i've only started on thursday and its been different to what I had thought.

1. i did not think i would be able to write 3 pages longhand each morning but find i can easily do that.... and i am surprised about some of the things that have come out

2. i think my biggest detractor is my DH which has surprised me. I am very easy going and would have described him as supportive before until i started writing....mmm.

3. my artists date - i went to a huge craft store and just wandered the aisles and then went to haberdashery store next door and found some fabulous eggshell blue and silver velvetly thick material for cushions for an old wooden armchair i painted and distressed about a year ago - and have never ever seen anything i liked for cushions - and it was only £2 per metre. how weird is my finding it? or maybe i just wasn't looking and it found me. spooky?

4. alternative jobs:

- aid camp nurse (this is why i originally trained as a nurse but life and committments got in the way of doing this)
-antropologist in Papua New Guinea (love language, culture and costume and PNG fascinates and scares me in equal measure)
- meteorologist (weather, clouds etc fascinate me too. weird or what?)
- art therapist
- own a cafe on the beach somewhere HOT
- run an animal sanctuary
- be an old fashioned explorer in the back of beyond

anyway i am finding this very interesting and thought provoking. thanks for sharing with me

[AmyK]

I'm glad you're joining us, Adee! Your alternate lives all sound so interesting. And as for finding that perfect fabric on your Artist's Date - I'd definitely call that synchronicity!! It sounds like you had a good time. :)

[kygirl]

The journaling really is fascinating, isn't it, Adee?

Pretty neat that you found the fabric. I definitely think it was meant to be.

[ArtcTrish]

WoW! Well I haven't read everyone's posts but what I did read was interesting....and seemingly VERY honest. Crap! That means I have to be honest too. LOL!

While I want to be a sucessful artist, the monsters in my head seem to be about mostly my theatre experience. My parents said I couldn't be a theatre major in college because I needed to do something that could make some money. Recently having gotten the nerve and opportunity to act again, my husband says "Its not like you are in New York or anything." UGHHH and WAAAAA! I did start in graphic design...a kind of art that appeased my parents but after I had a teacher tell me to switch to physical education, I switched to fine art....and all the dark artists just seemed to laugh at me and all my work. I finally told my husband the other day- I feel like I am underwater and someone is pushing me down...not letting me breathe for air.
Hows that for sharing! TMI?

My list-
Professional dancer
Broadway STAR
Successful painter
meterologist
web designer
pianist
ballet school owner/ teacher
movie actress
beachbum....provided I had funds to support it...lol

I think I'm going to do alot of crying in the next 12 weeks. :(

Here is my contract too.
http://www.digitalartquirks.com/photopost/showphoto.php?photo=3196

[AmyK]

Trish, thanks so much for sharing your experience so far. I have to tell you, I have done more crying than ever these 4 weeks so far. This week (reading deprivation, but I'm making an exception to reply to my fellow pilgrims), I feel like my dog died or something. One second I'm fine, and the next there are tears just dripping down my face. But I feel like I can finally grieve for those lost parts of my life, and that after I've grieved I can go DO what I want! I hope you find that kind of strength and resolve too. It sounds like you have a lot to grapple with, but I know you will be happier on the other side.

Thanks for sharing, and for journeying with us.

[graybonnie]

Trish...great post... I hope you find a life guard soon!

Amy... no more peeking...LOL... I think I may be able to complete your verison of deprivation!

[Pixeldigger]

I thought of joining in, but onw of my very worst failings is not taking care of myself, so I cannot commit to that darned contract. I just won't sign it if it isn't true.

[adee]

Trish - nothing is too much information. we like to know all the little details here, cause as they say sometime the little things are the big things... and I'm really nosey so quite happy to delve into your inner mind lol!

Judith, once you start it all makes sense. scarily enough, too much sense in some cases! you've got nothing to lose and a lot to gain by giving it to go.


and Amy, if you're reading this, you know you really shouldn't be, dont you? :p

[kygirl]

Trish, the first few weeks were hard for me, too. I found myself writing things in the Morning Pages that I had kept hidden for years. If you need a shoulder to cry on, we're always here.

[Pixeldigger]

My alternative lives:

Oceanographer, I have always loved the sea and studied oceanography for a year at uni.

Cruise nurse: This almost came true, but my boyfriend said, shocked, "You can't do that, you're going to marry me, aren't you?" We have been married 29 years, so maybe I made the right decision.

Astrophysicist: I am fascinated by space. I studied astrophysics at university; the math was difficult.

Teacher: Did that for a couple of years, overseas.

Chef: I do a lot of cooking and it is always appreciated. I love finding new recipes and love making curries and Asian influenced food - always from scratch, no packets for me! I am just making a foray into growing my own vegetables.

Opera Singer: I trained for a while, but asthma got in the way. I am a true contralto but my breath control was never going to be good enough to be top-rank.

[adee]

love your alternative lives Judith.

you get to pick some more in week 2, and marine biologist was one of my extra ones. what a fab thing to study. I'm hoping to save enough to take DH and DS with me to see the Great Barrier Reef when I'm 40 in 2 years time.

cruise nurse - cool when you are young free and single!

sounds like you a hell of a lot of hidden talent lurking within you, and you are telling us you are not sure whether to commit to this course? you gotta go for it girl!

[Pixeldigger]

Adee, I have been to the Great Barrier Reef. If you get a chance, fly in a helicopter over the reef, you see amazing things, like turtles swimming over a reef and then diving over the edge. Dive if you can. I took prescription goggles with me so that I could snorkel, it was fabulous!

[adee]

that sounds just fabulous. what part did you stay at? if it all goes t*ts up at my disciplinary meeting on thursday I may well be there by Saturday lol!

[kygirl]

I love the exercise of alternative careers. It's good to remember that the paths we've chosen are not set in stone.

Judith, you've done so many interesting things. I wish we could have a DAQ meet. I'd love to sit down and talk to all of the Quirks about their experiences. I think it's a pretty special group we have here.

[Pixeldigger]

We stayed at Cairns